Today I’ve spent well over an hour reviewing the draft results and telling my paralegal the things she needs to consider when planning our celebration for this Thursday, which obviously is September 2, 2010, aka “90210.” At first I was embarrassed, but then I decided that may be the best hour that anyone gets out of me until Saturday. Unfortunately I’m doing a lot of bluffing because I haven’t seen an episode in well over ten years, but the bluffing is a necessary evil considering my office has pretty much agreed that we will celebrate 90210 in some form. If you all have suggestions, let them rip. Car bombings have been nixed and amazingly, Nat from the Peach Pit is already booked. To the draft….
I don’t feel that today is the day for harsh criticism. Each of our squads has its weaknesses, but here is what I like about the teams:
Scott – best core of running backs complemented by what I rated as the fourth best receiving corps (with room to go up due to high ceilings for Megatron and Floyd) and an elite tight end. Having Bush/Moreno as his flex play is pretty damn scary.
Jason – My receivers are an obvious weakness, but I like having elite guys at QB and TE, and a solid group of RBs that becomes extremely dangerous if Stewart starts getting more touches.
Steve – The Moss-Brady combo pretty much means that in the weeks where Moss gets 2+ TDs, Steve wins. That’s a nice thing to have going on. He also surrounded MJD with dependable, although not flashy RBs. He just needs 8 to 12 out of his non-MJD backs anyway.
Everett – Brings Schaub back for another go, and picks up McCoy as a strong flex back. I like Boldin and Bowe as receivers. Bowe seems primed for a bounce back year. Celek stands to gain a ton of yards, and Winslow falls into that category of “someone has to do something for that offense.”
Brandon – Ronnie Brown is Frank Gore light. He’s going to get hurt, but he’ll be dynamite for the weeks he plays. Steven Jackson, DeAngelo, and Brown all have their warts, but those are three really solid backs, and Mike Bell could be a high upside guy depending on how things shake out in Philly. Seriously, Brandon, this luscious pompadour? Yeah, Bironas’s sister-in-law cuts it. She has had exclusive rights to my haircutting duties privileges since 2000. That’s two years in a row that you’ve decided to take Bironas. Is this a personal thing? You’re making things between us awkward. I was so stunned I didn’t even draft a kicker. How about next year I draft Westbrook and Scott Rolen?
Taylor – No weaknesses on Taylor’s squad, which means he can pick up the best players available off the waiver wire without regard to strengthening a specific position. Jennings and Steve Smith could easily combine for 2,500 yards. Even if they don’t get a ton of touchdowns, A-Rod will. Manchild secures the TE spot.
Ben – Depending on the Vincent Jackson situation, potentially the strongest group of receivers. Talent and depth at QB, so in case Manning drops off a bit, he has Kolb to slide into place. Kolb was also a good defensive move because it makes either Scott, Tyler, or Jim’s team weaker going into Week 1. The Jahvid Best pick had Bill Raftery yelling “onions!” Yeah, Bill Raftery watched our draft, he was at my house. He passed out from too much High Life (or boredom) in the sixth round, though, and agreed that we really need to draft in person in the future.
John – Romo may put up insane numbers this year. Grant and Forte are a nice top two at RB, and McGahee and McFadden figure to be the top two time-share RBs of Irish descent. Reggie Wayne and DeSean Jackson look awfully nice at receiver, and Meachem and Sidney Rice could pay dividends down the road. Witten gets you points every week, and normally that’s all you want from a tight end.
Tyler – really like the core of Charles, Greene, and Pierre Thomas. LT and Felix Jones provide polar opposites off the bench, which I think is a good thing. The Steve Smith curse…heavy lies the crown. However, Miles Austin, Sims-Walker, and Johnny Knox provide stability and potential upside with the WRs.
Jim – Cutler potentially has a great season, and Young’s legs ensure that he gets decent numbers on most weeks. I actually think people have been too down on Portis, and being able to flex him into the lineup with Beanie and Benson makes Jimmy’s backfield more than serviceable. I think he has the best receivers, with Andre Johnson and Brandon Marshall being likely studs, and Ochocinco being a guy that should always get at least 50 yards.
It really looks like everyone did a nice job. Way to go, friends!
