Live Updates from UPG Playoff Party

Suday 1:30 PM
Greetings to the losers!
Winners are all here having a good time at the Chip and Dip Fiesta for the Playoff Teams of the UPG. We are having some of the best dips I've ever had, some of the best tasting beers that have ever graced my lips.

Some of the decisions we are discussing this year for the league:
1. Whether Tyler is allowed to be in league next year.
The problem is that this is a wonderful league, and in just about any other league Tyler's team could just fly under the radar. In our league it's an eyesore, though. It's the abandoned house in your neighborhood with broken windows. The children talk about how it's haunted, and nobody goes near it during Halloween. If we can condemn that house, maybe it's the humane thing to do.
2. Voting on Tyler's worst rejected trade opportunity.
This should be a fun game, and I encourage everyone to submit players that Tyler decided were not quite "Stabbing Robot material"
3. Will we allow Tyler to remained married to Amy? Who will we decide to be her new, better mate?
Amy's a great girl. We all love her. It's pretty inconvenient that we may have to find a replacement team to fill the void left behind by Tyler. We really don't want to find another cool girl to spend time with us. There is too much risk involved with hookers and strangers. I don't want Amy to have to be alone, so I think the best approach is to nominate the guy who would be able to take good care of her (no offense, Tyler, none of this is personal)

Now I'm going to jump off my roof before Manningham scores another TD on my bench.