Last Night's Draft

I just wanted to tell you guys how truly unmemorable last night's draft was. Aside from all the Gmail malfunctions, I'd say we can all agree that we should try to avoid drafting online at all costs in the future. We set the bar high last year in Jason't man cave with beer, comraderie, and food. Now we need to maintain that level for years to come so that our league's reputation will not be tarnished.

While attempting to log on and off and on and off again to get my group chat working, I began to daydream about how much more fun it would have been live...


Ben - your heartwarming "I like that pick a lot" phrase would have been enjoyed a lot more in person.

Taylor - your impatience and pure evil would have made you even more of an enemy had we seen it live.

Scott - your draft board software would have been much more appreciated if we had seen it and been able to choose our theme songs (this would have brought so much joy to my face since I would probably choose a Chromeo song or Boyz II Men's "Motownphilly").

Jason - I would have loved seeing you covered in baby piss while drinking High Life from a champagne glass...its sort of a fetish of mine.

Everett - don't you think those hearts would have meant more had you been able to give them out in person?

Jimmy - I can see you now: drafting your team wearing your Kirk Herbstreit jersey, yelling Who Dey after every pick, playing "We Don't Give a Damn for the Whole State of Michigan" as your theme song, wearing a pair of Cincinnati Bengals zubaz pants, all while eating a Skyline 4-way.

John - Jesus, you take forever on picks and take people that have already been selected...but I think I would find this humorous and likable in person rather than how pissed off it makes everyone (esp. Taylor) while voting online.

Tyler - I think next year when we have our live draft I will offer to give you any player on my roster if you can still do 100 push-ups to "In Da Club" by 50 Cent.

Steve - I wish I could see your face when you thought of all the points that could be put up through the Brady-Moss connection...I'm sure you were as giddy as a schoolgirl.


In closing, I want to reiterate that I thoroughly enjoy this great league because it is something I like doing, but also because I get to see all my good buddies that I don't see very often (yes Scott and Everett, we haven't known each other very long, but if you're good enough for Taylor and Jason, you're damn good enough for me).

I hope I never have to go through last night alone again...(tear).